CLICK HERE to watch the official trailer for The Lone Ranger.
Now playing in theaters across Hampton Roads.
We get the whole backstory here and then some! We learn how Tonto and the Lone Ranger came to be partners and why he wears a mask and why Tonto was crazy, but we never find out why there are so many chase scenes, shoot outs, and explosions in the wild West in this film. Ugh.
There are a ton of subplots and characters shoved into this film. Gore Verbinski directed this and guess what else he directed? Pirates of the Caribbean! All of them.
Armie Hammer does an adequate job here, but for me Johnny Depp is just Jack Sparrow reincarnated with make up on speaking broken English to make us buy into him being an old Indian. The Sparrow-ish dry wit and Depp-esque timing on the humor make it hard for us to forget he’s Johnny Depp.
This is a Disney film, and for the life of me, I just don’t get it. I expected to be much more entertained and feel something through the story. Plus there’s this weird mingling of ancient Tonto pretending to be a statue in a traveling sideshow who comes to life and tells the old story of the Lone Ranger and Tonto to a passing kid. This inner-cutting between old Tonto and young Tonto is really distracting and makes the movie a lot longer than it needs to be — like an hour longer than it needs to be! Seems more like a ploy to make little kids interested in a film they probably wouldn’t otherwise be interested in.
If you’re askin’…skip this one Tonto! I mean PRONTO.
TWO OUT OF FIVE COOKIES
Rated PG-13 for sequences of intense action and violence, and some suggestive material.